Forgotten Past

三年前我已经输了一次，这一次我不会再输了..



"可是我一直找不到她

一直找不到那个曾经很爱我的blurrie..

她为什么要离开。。?

为什么不要我跟熊熊了。。?

我有一直在等她..

一直只爱 blurrie 一个人

blurrie, 我好想你...."

An unexpected turn of event for me...


today i saw my ex gf with another guy...

how amazing isnt it? when you thought you had forgotten every single thing abt her.. forgotten abt the times you had spent with her.. and the moment she appeared..every single moments just came back like a flash and replaying in my mind now.. you know what my friend said..they said i have not forgotten her since the day she left my life..it is just that she had been hidden deep in my heart.. so deep that i had forgotten the existence of her..and now think abt it...

was i trying to love someone with my mind?...or was it i just duno who exactly do i really really love ?

or was it i still love my ex gf still..?

but its so confusing.....on the other hand ,how come i feel lost when ruth ignored me..how come i feel so aimless w/o her ? i duno wats going on

comparison of damage

the more my bff drag the issue the more tiring i get and w/o strength..

but my ex..
she had the power of taking my breathe away in that very one sec instantly when i saw her..

both are damaging ...


i think i m going insane sooner or later..

uptilll now i feel like a big boulder is right on my chest and i cant breathe..


"我爱过几个人也被爱过几遍
却还是没能将幸福留下"

一月二十四号是我跟她的最后期限。。

我跟沈怡俐的缘分

真的尽了吗?

当我闭上眼，

用心去想她，


她在我心里的样子



"她长得不是很高，在我的记忆里我最喜欢她的bob hair style.

她有一双很小的眼睛，是双眼皮而不是单眼皮。

她笑起来的时候，总是会眯着小眼睛。

她总是跟在我的后面，过马路的时候我总是想牵她的"小手"

因为她有时候很迷糊 所以我会很担心她会有意外。



逛街的时候，总是要我陪她看衣服和靴子

然后要我选我觉得好看地，总是要看我的品味是否跟她一样。





走累的时候，就会要休息找地方坐下聊天。

她害羞的时候会傻笑着看着我，也会细声说话。



我难过的时候她会在我的身边

她难过的时候，我会想紧紧的抱着她

告诉她"不要怕还有我在你身边"

不过有时的她很勇敢很坚强，就算被打倒了，失败了，还会再站起来。
"

大家可能以为她是我的女朋友，可是

她并不是我的女朋友，但是她对我来说很重要。。

因为她是我最好的朋友，也是我最在乎的人，最不能失去的朋友。"



这就是她在我心里的样子..

我的感情不是这么不值钱，也不是垃圾

 

this is how i feel now.. it feel sucks when u noe there isnt any solution to this whole damn fucking problem..

cuz either way i still lose her.. and how i wish tt i dun feel anything.

some of the things that i wan to say..

 

“我不得不承认我已经完全失去你了”

 

“我們都無法回到過去而前方也看不到未來”

 

“她有没有喜欢过我 也许是我这辈子永远也不知道的答案”

 

“她真的有来过我的世界吗?

如果有那我为什么会让她离开我的身边?

如果没有 为什么我的心会这么痛?

 

她走了以后 她的味道会慢慢散去

她的样子会慢慢模糊”

I would like to say is a very wrong statement to say "love yourself more"
because loving yourself more is just being more selfish than before..

sorry i am not a selfish person.

I WILL NOT STOP UNTIL I HAVE MY REVENGE
AND I SWEAR IT WITH MY OWN BLOOD..